Have you ever tried to call a movie theatre?

Well, good luck. 

For showtimes, press 1.For directions, press 2. For prices, press 3. For advance ticket sales, press 4. 

(silence)

Hnmmm. I want to talk to a real person. I need to know when Indiana Jones is showing in a big theatre instead of the crappy ones where we have to sit in the very front row. No option for 'talk to real person instead of annoying canned message'. 

Blogauthor pushes 0. 

Welcome to Carmike Cinemas! For showtimes, press 1. For directions, press ......

Argh. 

Blogauthors googles / switchboards / 411s / searchs high and low for another phone number .... ah-ha! Finds one. Dials. 

Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring..... 

(insert 2 minutes of ringing here)

... Ring. Ring. Ring. 

Tries autobot line again, pushing *0, #, #0, 109 (hoping to get an extension maybe). Nope. Yell into phone hoping maybe it has voice recognition. Nope. Hang up, try again, maybe I missed something that first 6 times I tried. Nope. Regoogle, reswitchboard, re411, research. Nope.

I JUST WANNA KNOW WHEN INDIANA JONES IS PLAYING IN A NON-CRAPPY THEATRE! 

Is that really too much to ask?

My home is not broken

Maybe its because of Mother's Day, but in surfing my usual news sources online, I have read an inordinate number of articles about working mothers trying to balance career / family, about kids and discipline and any other number of family related topics. In nearly all of them, the term "broken home" is used. This is a universal term used for families with children with divorced parents. 

I am divorced (albeit married now). 

I am a parent. 

MY HOME WAS NOT BROKEN!

It's amazing how much this is upsetting me. I don't know if I've just never noticed this before, or if I'm hormonal or something, but I am really chagrined about this and feeling down. 

MY HOME IS NOT BROKEN!

Crushed and melted

We went to Chilis one day and saw this sign .... and he was absolutely adamant that cars in the to-go spots really would be crushed and melted. No matter how much I told him it was just a joke, he insisted it must be true because it was on a real sign: