Just exactly how stupid do they think I am?

The NY Times charges $15 a month (get that, $15 A MONTH) for full online digital access.  Free access is limited to 20 articles a month.  Shoot, I read 20 articles a day - and that's not an exaggeration most days.  I read the digital equivalent of cover to cover every day; its pretty much my only news source.  So for the past year or so I've been paying $15 a month for the all you can eat buffet of liberal elite media. 

Today I logged on and there was a big banner ad "Cyber Monday Sale! 50% off Digital Access for 1 Year!".  Really?!?!  WOW!  So I clicked through all the screens, filled out all the boxes, and hit enter.  It then informed me that I'm not eligible because I already have an active digital subscription. 

SERIOUSLY? 

First of all, I am precisely the customer you should reward. It pisses me off that I can't get as good of a deal as the guy off the street. 

Secondly, and perhaps should be firstly, the digital access is solely controlled via an email username/password combination.  Let's see.  I'm gonna put on my ole thinking' cap, some smokes ah gonna blow outta my ears while I do somes thinkin' and golly gee gosh, I'll just CANCEL my current subscription and sign up under another email address.  HELLO?!?!?!  What kind of idiot do they think I am???????

So I clicked through all the menus to cancel my online subscription and guess what, you can't cancel your online subscription online.  You have to CALL.  Gee, they make it so convenient.... So I duly called. "Hello, this is the NY Times Customer Service Line, please hold while we transfer you to one of our customer service agents". 

[Sidebar your honor: why do they have to transfer you?  Since I called directly in, do they really have to transfer me?  I digress.]

When I talked to someone, I told them exactly why I was canceling and exactly what I was going to do - sign up under another email address ... because (say it with me:) I'm not stupid.  So she says "If I give you 4 more weeks for 99 cents would you consider staying?  Me: uhhhhh, no.  She then says "If I give you 2 months at half price would you consider staying?".  Me: uhhhh, no, I'm going to get 12 MONTHS at half price by signing up under another email address!  She then says "Is there anything else I can help you with?"  I said "Yes, you can tell someone that it is a very bad idea to penalize your curent customers".  She said "Thank you, have a nice day" click. 

So now I'm signed up for 1 year at half price under Wheeler's email address.  Well duh.