Sure signs you are the spouse of someone with a spinal cord injury

Sure signs you are an SCI caregiver wife:

• When you know quad doesn't mean the square in the middle of the campus
• When every third person you meet in public says to you in a voice of hushed reverence, with a gentle pat on your arm and an ever so small tear glinting in their eye, that "you are so special to be with him"
• When people ask of you "are you his mother"? or "are you his nurse?"
• When people speak to you instead of your perfectly articulate sci'ed mate
• When you routinely discuss the finer points of bowel movement management at dinner (often in public... without even noticing)
• When you really miss not having hubby with you because you don't have his wheelchair on which to hang your purse or shopping bags
• When your husband says "I think I need to pee", it's you that gets up
• When there is a cockroach, wasp or other horribly scary bug in the house, YOU are the one in charge of killing it.
• When you are really good at fixing wheelchairs, clogged toilets and any manner of small electrical devices
• When you visit someone who is sick in the hospital, and they ask for a drink of water, you start to hold a drink up to their mouth so they can take a sip, and check to make sure they’re properly padded in bed and their heels aren’t touching the mattress.... and then remember: oh crap, they're not paralyzed!
• When you can build a 4 foot section of a chain link fence solely out of zip ties and duct tape
• When you’re flipping the TV channels and you see the SCI-FI channel, and your first thought is that it must be some show on Spinal Cord Injury
• When you holler at your sci'ed hubby to get off his ass and hurry it up, people around you look completely aghast at your horrible treatment of the disabled
• When the phrase "the crips and the bloods" means hemorrhoids in the disabled
• When you are always on top, and related, rather than ask your husband if he's "in the mood", you have to go check
• When you are in complete and total charge of the tv flipper
• When you can diagnose a UTI with one whiff, perform extensive range of motion, percussive quad coughing, change a suprapubic catheter while half asleep and perform brain surgery because its all considered "custodial care" by your insurance company
• When your sci'ed mate is in the hospital, you are quasi-admitted yourself since you can't leave him alone there with a call button he can't operate
• When your dog leaves a dead rabbit on the doorstep, YOU are the one out digging the hole to bury it

And the number one sure sign that you're a quad caregiver wife .....

• You found this post funny