CAPTAIN'S LOG
Definitive diagnosis of illness of the First Officer Wheeler will now come from a Tricorder ordered last night from Amazon (Prime) because Dr. Crusher can’t come up with the answer yet of the source of the sepsis. Unfortunately the Tricorder is on backorder with an estimated shipping date of September 12, 4056. Vital signs of First Officer Wheeler have improved somewhat but morale is rapidly plummeting after 7 days of monotony. The medical doctor is putting on a wound vac to help heal his Stage 3 sore this afternoon. The Holodeck and Food Replicators remain on the fritz. Jordy has been summoned to fix these areas but has not been located yet. We think he is the Cantina getting drunk.
As the Captain, the journey has been slow and uneventful, and thus I have made a scarf as tall as I am while driving the ship. The estimated date of docking has now been updated to “maybe the end of the week”. A variety of medical personnel continue to parade through the First Officer’s bunk, usually most conveniently, just as he’s fallen asleep after the previous evening’s long hard night with pain and GI issues.
The canine unit continues to be quarantined.
Last night, visitors came aboard from another star ship (the shuttle USS Honda CRV Morrisville, Captain Offspring's Dad and First Officer Offpsring), bringing a hilarious and thoroughly twisted game called “Cards Against Humanity”. Raucous laughter echoed over the entire ship and all persons nearly got thrown in the brig for behavior unbecoming an officer.
End log.
Log addendum: Infectious disease doctor was here and he wants Wheeler to stay until next Monday at the minimum. So we are stuck here for 5 more days. UGH.
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